If Valve's proven anything over the years, it's that it knows two things: games and sales. Going by that (incredibly flimsy) logic, then,
The Great Steam Treasure Hunt
is the culmination of everything Valve's ever created. Think we're full of crap? Well, fine then, leave. We'll just keep all these great deals and priceless prizes for ourselves. Oh, back so soon? Yeah, that's what we thought.
So here's how it works: The Steam Treasure Hunt tasks you with completing any of ten in-game objectives leading up to December 20, when three winners will be given a golden ticket to crazy Newell's videogame factory. Translation: 100 free games of your choosing. On top of that, Valve's selecting 20 contestants every two days and granting them the top five games in their wishlist.
Let's face it, though: this sort of thing is just a step or two below the lottery. Why even try? Well, for you, Debbie, and the rest of the Downer family, there's still a reason to briefly shoo that stormcloud away from your head. Whenever a game has an objective attached to it (for instance, right now you need to become a Desert Fox in RUSE, among other things), it's put on sale. Currently, RUSE is going for $33.49, Poker Night at the Inventory's at $2.99, and Chime's at $1.25.
So then, there's something for everyone. Unfortunately, it's now only a matter of time until Valve makes shopping as fun as playing Half-Life, Portal, or Team Fortress, at which point we'll all go end up living on the streets. For now, though, hooray!