Daily News Brief: What's Cookin' Inside Apple?

Inside Apple

Curse the iPhone's lack of 3G support all you want. Berate your iPod after the battery stops holding a charge. And shake your head in agreement as Gordon Mah Ung rants against all things iMac. In the end, it doesn't matter; Apple has redefined the standards to be hip, and they've done it with a single iLetter. Get used to it, because love 'em or hate 'em, Apple holds a veritable treasure trove of patents for products yet to see the light of day, and some that never will. A Mac tablet? It's in the works, and so is souped up keyboard similar to the Optimus Maximus. A half-pound wireless headset? Thank Steve Jobs that one never materialized. Here's your hall pass inside Apple R&D...

Can I Get Free Shipping with That?

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but it takes a jealous geek to try and sell his wife on Ebay. Paul Osborn, 44, offered his "cheating, lying, adulterous slag of a wife" to the highest bidder on Ebay, with bids reaching as high as $969,890. We doubt Paul will ever see a cent from the auction, and instead could end up paying a fine pending an investigation for harassment.

MySpace Mom Indicted

A federal grand jury indicted a Missouri woman yesterday over an alleged role in a MySpace hoax played on a 13-year-old girl who ultimately committed suicide. Lois Drew is being charged with one count of conspiracy and three counts of accessing protected computers without authorization to obtain information to inflict emotional distress. Follow the breaking news story here.

Real Life Iron Men

Being Army Strong could one day mean wielding around a robotic suit if Rex Jameson has his way. The 5-foot-11, 180-pound software engineer showed off an "exoskeleton" of aluminum and electronics that, once he stepped inside, allowed him to multiply his strength and endurance by as many as 20 times. Jameson works for robotics firm Sacrcos Inc. and is helping to assess the 150-pound suit's viability for the U.S. Army. But before the suit can be become practical, the developers must first overcome cost barriers and extend the suit's battery life, which currently only lasts 30 minutes.

Hookers and Halo

Odd combination you say? Not if you're a 13-year-old teen from Texas. According to Money.co.uk, Ralph Hardy of Newark, Texas confessed to ordering a credit card from his father's existing credit card company, and then treated his friends to a $30,000 spending spree. The night ended with the youngsters hiring a pair of escort girls to to come up to their hotel room and...play Halo, of course! If you read one news story today, this is the one...

Team Monkey Wins Folding@Home Chimp Challenge 2008!

For a brief blip in time, chaos reigned supreme and the coveted Jaded Monkey left the confines of Maximum PC. But not to be denied a consecutive year, Team Monkey laid the gauntlet down on the competition in this year's Chimp Challenge, beating out the top folders in the world ([H]ardOCP, Overclockers Australia, and Overclockers.com). With the Jaded Monkey back where it belongs, order has been restored in the universe. Congratulations to all who participated!