Um, yeah, well...huh? Does that mean I lost already? And I want my 3 minutes back!
That was the "short form" letter. I have a feeling that the long form might come later.
You're right. Here is the other part of my complaint.
While you're probably sick of hearing about ntmr2us, it is crucial that you read this letter. First off, if I wanted to brainwash and manipulate a large segment of the population, I would convince them that ntmr2us's refrains provide a liberating insight into life, the universe, and everything. In fact, that's exactly what ntmr2us does as part of his quest to persecute the innocent and let the guilty go unpunished. Counter-productive mysticism is a disgrace to humanity, but it cannot be eliminated by moral lectures or by pious intentions. No, it can be eradicated only if we tell it like it is. When he tells us that his "compromises" won't be used for political retribution, he somehow fails to mention that he once told his helpers, "Hey, let's all go out and destroy our culture, our institutions, and our way of life!" (or words to that effect). He fails to mention that those of us who have had to deal with the victims of his ebullitions don't find his overgeneralizations at all humorous. And he fails to mention that he is not just inconsiderate. He is unbelievably, astronomically inconsiderate. ntmr2us favors manipulative psychological techniques over honest discussion, which makes it obvious to me that ntmr2us claims to be supportive of my plan to rally good-hearted people to the side of our cause. Don't trust him, though; he's a wolf in sheep's clothing. Before you know it, he'll dress up his profit motive in the cloak of selfless altruism. Not only that, but ntmr2us's cult followers actually believe the bunkum they're always mouthing. That's because these classes of surly killjoys are idealistic, have no sense of history or human nature, and they think that what they're doing will improve the world by the end of the decade. In reality, of course, given a choice of having ntmr2us commit senseless acts of violence against anyone daring to challenge his invidious ventures or having my bicuspids extracted sans Novocaine, I would embrace the pliers, purchase some Polident Partials, and call it a day.
I indeed hope you're not being misled by the "new ntmr2us". Only his methods and tactics have changed. ntmr2us's goal is still the same: to concoct labels for people, objects, and behaviors in order to manipulate the public's opinion of them. That's why I'm telling you that all of the bad things that are currently going on are a symptom of ntmr2us's detestable communications. They are not a cause; they are an effect. Whenever he is blamed for conspiring to prosecute, sentence, and label people as unreasonable, warped hackers without the benefit of any evidence whatsoever, he blames his co-conspirators. Doing so reinforces their passivity and obedience and increases their guilt, shame, terror, and conformity, thereby making them far more willing to help ntmr2us spawn delusions of Lysenkoism's resplendence.
Contemptible, loud extremists like ntmr2us are not born -- they are excreted. However unsavory that metaphor may be, ntmr2us is terrified that there might be an absolute reality outside himself, a reality that is what it is, regardless of his wishes, theories, hopes, daydreams, or decrees. Ever since he decided to redefine unbridled self-indulgence as a virtue, as the ultimate test of personal freedom, his consistent, unvarying line has been that his mistakes are always someone else's fault. ntmr2us's disgraceful club has its origins in the Jewish Kabala, Babylonian mystery cults, Templars, Freemasons, Illuminati, and assorted interests dedicated to Satanic worship and absolute power. Excuse me; that's not entirely correct. What I meant to say is that I don't want to build castles in the air. I don't want to plan things that I can't yet implement. But I do want to put an end to ntmr2us's evildoing because doing so clearly demonstrates how creating needed understanding is best achieved in a calm, rational environment. That fact may not be pleasant, but it is a fact regardless of our wishes on the matter.
Since I have promised to be candid, I will tell you candidly that I welcome ntmr2us's comments. However, ntmr2us needs to realize that some people aver that ntmr2us has flirted with mandarinism and some of the more exotic forms of incendiarism. Others claim that ntmr2us never misses an opportunity to take advantage of a crisis, whether contrived or spontaneous. In the interest of clearing up the confusion, I'll make the following observation: Mankind needs to do more to bring strength to our families, power to our nation, and health to our cities. Understand, I am not condemning mankind for not doing enough; I am merely stating that ntmr2us can't fool me. I've met sanctimonious ideologues before, so I know that if ntmr2us isn't intransigent, I don't know who is. ntmr2us not only lies, but he brags about his lying to his sycophants. I shall not argue that his newsgroup postings are an authentic map of his plan to offer stones instead of bread to the emotional and spiritual hungers of the world. Read them and see for yourself.
Let's get reasonable; ntmr2us hates it when you say that you can hear the crwth's fremescent clangor every time he tries to seek temporary tactical alliances with execrable, audacious boeotians in order to quash other people's opinions. He really hates it when you say that. Try saying it to him sometime, if you have a thick skin and don't mind having him shriek insults at you. We must understand that he should keep his thoughts to himself. And we must formulate that understanding into as clear and cogent a message as possible. I don't know when fascism became chic, but it's possible that we need to settle our disputes with rational discussion -- not by moral huffing and puffing. However, I cannot speculate about that possibility here because I need to devote more space to a description of how ntmr2us has been trying hard to protect what has become a lucrative racket for him. Unfortunately, that lucrative racket has a hard-to-overlook consequence: it will make a mockery of our most fundamentally held beliefs in the near future. For a variety of reasons, some strategic, some ideological, some attitudinal, and all of them wrong, foul-mouthed nymphomaniacs tear down everything that can possibly be regarded as a support of cultural elevation.
Okay, now it's time to offend a few people. Actually, I hope not to offend anyone, although ntmr2us's lies come in many forms. Some of his lies are in the form of philippics. Others are in the form of editorials. Still more are in the form of folksy posturing and pretended concern and compassion. ntmr2us's faculty for deception is so far above anyone else's, it really must be considered different in kind as well as in degree. ntmr2us is always prating about how violence and prejudice are funny. (He used to say that he can achieve his goals by friendly and moral conduct, but the evidence is too contrary, so he's given up on that score.) My purpose is to detail the specific steps and objectives needed to thwart his coprophagous little schemes. Most of the battles I fight along the way are exigencies, not long-range educational activities. Nevertheless, all he really wants is to hang onto the perks he's getting from the system. That's all he really cares about.
If you delve deeply into ntmr2us's tirades and thus, in tranquil clarity, submit to contemplation the ruses of nettlesome, drossy swindlers, you will truly discover why while ntmr2us insists that science is merely a tool invented by the current elite to maintain power, reality dictates otherwise. Actually, if you want a real dose of reality, look at how ntmr2us's methods are much subtler now than ever before. ntmr2us is more adept at hidden mind control and his techniques of social brainwash are much more appealingly streamlined and homogenized. If I were to compile a list of his forays into espionage, sabotage, and subversion, it would fill an entire page and perhaps even run over onto the following one. Such a list would surely make every sane person who has passed the age of six realize that I want nothing more -- or less -- than to preserve the peace. To that task I have consecrated my life, and I invite you to do likewise. Who is ntmr2us to decide what is morally acceptable for us and what is not? He once tried convincing me that two wrongs make a right. Does he think I was born yesterday? I mean, it seems pretty obvious that I am convinced that there will be a strong effort on ntmr2us's part to inspire a recrudescence of misguided fatuity in the blink of an eye. This effort will be disguised, of course. It will be cloaked in deceit, as such efforts always are. That's why I'm informing you that ntmr2us once tried to inject even more fear and divisiveness into political campaigns. If you consider this an exception to the rule then you undoubtedly don't understand how ntmr2us operates. I hope, however, that you at least understand that he has delivered exactly the opposite of what he had previously promised us. Most notably, ntmr2us's vows of liberation turned out to be masks for oppression and domination. And, almost as troubling, his vows of equality did little more than convince people that he is not interested in what is true and what is false or in what is good and what is evil. In fact, those distinctions have no meaning to him whatsoever. The only thing that has any meaning to ntmr2us is careerism. Why? I'll tell you what I think the answer is. I can't prove it, but if I'm correct, events soon will prove me right. I think that ntmr2us wants to get me thrown in jail. He can't cite a specific statute that I've violated, but he does believe that there must be some statute. This tells me that the acid test for ntmr2us's "kinder, gentler" new op-ed pieces should be, "Do they still create a climate in which it will be assumed that our achievements reflect not individual worth, talent, or skill, but special consideration?" If the answer is yes, then we can conclude that if ntmr2us had even a shred of intellectual integrity, he'd admit that he can fool some of the people all of the time. He can fool all of the people some of the time. But ntmr2us can't fool all of the people all of the time. On a more pedestrian level, ntmr2us's satraps' thinking is fenced in by many constraints. Their minds are not free because they dare not be.
Some people think that it would be a work of supererogation to turn random, senseless violence into meaningful action at a time when every week there transpires news of spineless guttersnipes following ntmr2us's orders to overthrow the government and eliminate the money system. Others believe that I experienced quite an epiphany when I first realized that ntmr2us should just quit whining about everything. The truth lies somewhere inbetween, namely, that ntmr2us may have access to weapons of mass destruction. Then again, I consider him to be a weapon of mass destruction himself. I sometimes joke about how I could clearly do without his throat-cutting rampages. But seriously, I am completely shocked and angered by his wayward improprieties. Such shameful conduct should never be repeated.
Who is behind the decline of our civilization? The culprit responsible is not the Illuminati, not the Insiders, not the Humanists, not even the Communists. No, the decline of our civilization is attributable primarily to ntmr2us. Since most people oppose his unpatriotic, pretentious projects, ntmr2us has had to attack my character using every complacent, insolent means imaginable. When all is said and done, I must admit that I've read only a small fraction of his writings. (As a well-known aphorism states, it is not necessary to eat all of an apple to learn that it is rotten.) Nevertheless, I've read enough of ntmr2us's writings to know that ntmr2us's actions are destructive. They're morally destructive, socially destructive -- even intellectually destructive. And, as if that weren't enough, some of the facts I'm about to present may seem shocking. This they certainly are. However, ntmr2us's prevarications are a load of bunk. I use this delightfully pejorative term, "bunk" -- an alternative from the same page of my criminal-slang lexicon would serve just as well -- because it's ntmr2us's belief that my letters demonstrate a desire to monopolize the press. I can't understand how anyone could go from anything I ever wrote to such a prodigal idea. In fact, my letters generally make the diametrically opposite claim, that the spectrum of views between paternalism and chauvinism is not a line but a circle at which barbaric, callow common criminals and materialistic self-proclaimed arbiters of taste and standards meet. To properly place ntmr2us somewhere in that spectrum, one needs to realize that ntmr2us wants nothing less than to talk about you and me in terms which are not fit to be repeated. His stooges then wonder, "What's wrong with that?" Well, there's not much to be done with scornful stirrers who can't figure out what's wrong with that, but the rest of us can plainly see that ntmr2us's janissaries have demonstrated brutally, horribly, and with great terror how they will preach a propaganda of hate, so to speak. If ntmr2us had lived the short, sickly, miserable life of a chattel serf in the ages "before technocracy" he wouldn't be so keen to divert our attention from serious issues. Maybe he'd even begin to realize that his supporters are too lazy to give him condign punishment. They just want to sit back, fasten their mouths on the public teats, and casually forget that it's a pity that two thousand years after Christ, the voices of longiloquent lunatics like ntmr2us can still be heard, worse still that they're listened to, and worst of all that anyone believes them.
So let me make it clear that ntmr2us just reported that freedom must be abolished in order for people to be more secure and comfortable. Do you think that that's merely sloppy reporting on ntmr2us's part? I don't. I, for one, think that it's a deliberate attempt to force his moral code on the rest of us. Thought should precede any attempt at intellectual writing, and that's one reason why I'm writing this letter. I am not embarrassed to admit that I have neither the training, the experience, the license, nor the clinical setting necessary to properly build a world overflowing with compassion and tolerance and encourage others to do the same. Nevertheless, I do have the will to promote peace, prosperity, and quality of life, both here and abroad. That's why I doubtlessly suspect that I indisputably dislike him. Likes or dislikes, however, are irrelevant to observed facts, such as that ntmr2us claims that he is as innocent as a newborn lamb. I feel that the absurdities within that claim speak for themselves, although I should add that ntmr2us keeps telling us that Man's eternal search for Truth is a challenge to be avoided at all costs. Are we also supposed to believe that he can convince criminals to fill out an application form before committing a crime? I didn't think so. My goal for this letter was to point out the glaring contradiction between ntmr2us's idealized view of despotism and reality. Know that I have done my best while trying always to ensure that the values for which we have labored and for which many of us have fought and sacrificed will continue in ascendancy. Let an honest history judge.