“Huh?! Oh – hello there. Sorry if we seem a tad shaken; we’ve been playing the newly released
F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin demo
, and the default control scheme must’ve jammed our pretzeled fingers right into an alt-tab. Guess we should have seen that coming after the first F.E.A.R.’s somewhat cumbersome default controls, but then,
we can’t lean around corners anymore
, so forgive us for our lack of vision.
Now then, we’re just going to hop back into the game and—hey! Is that crying? Oh my, we think it’s a little girl. And she’s all alone, her tears softly landing atop the spilled jars of strawberry jam she was clearly trying to sell. Talk to you later, everyone; we’re off to become some little girl’s hero!”
--Nathan Grayson (1989-2009)