Steve Ballmer is "Super-Glad" Microsoft Built Surface, Thinks Windows 8 Adoption is "Perfect"

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krash3x

How do you guys know that he doesn't really believe that? Maybe.....just maybe......after seeing him completely change the face of Microsoft....he is that stupid.

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OpTicaL

First step in solving a problem is to admit there is one. Which is the problem Ballmer's parents face when Steve B. was born. Garbage in garbage out, it's that simple.

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TrollBot5000

:P .oooh i can't keep it inside...hahahhahahhhAHAHAHhahhahHAHhahhahAHH!!!

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maxeeemum

What else do you expect him to say??? "We really screwed up with Windows 8". That's not going to happen!!!

He did the same thing with Vista. This guy is the "used car salesman" for M$. He'll say "anything" to sell his product.

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warptek2010

If anybody from the board of directors is reading this please,PLEASE consider dumping this guy and doing WHATever it takes to get Gates back at the helm.

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fung0

I think we can be 100% certain that Gates isn't coming back. But never mind... ANYBODY would be better than Ballmer.

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arkarkwin

I have two horrible experiences with Window 8. First, we use Symantec Endpoint and a payroll personal asked me to install company's security suite on her newly acquired laptop from Christmas sale for work at home purpose ( I don't question payroll and HR personals). Window 8 took half of my day recovering from that nasty crash. Then, I found out about incompatibility and managed to receive a patched version from Symantec.
Second, despite that experience, I bought two copies of Window 8 before promotion period expired just in case. I used one copy last two weeks for my media-center PC. It failed to install major security updates for whatever reason and I lost my will to investigate. I try to install Skype and it will only let me download Metro/Modern version instead of the desktop. I didn't log in with my personal outlook account because that PC is a share PC connected to the living room panel for video conferencing, watching youtube and you get the point. Although I did managed to download an offline installer for skype, that is not the way it should work. And, I still refuse to log in my MS account because I cannot have that PC tied to my account because it is shared with other people.
On the side note, Internet Explorer 10 constantly crashes when I try to play Yahoo video, and Microsoft Live Cam (from MS) crashes when I use it with IE 10. $80 down the drain and I blame myself constantly for that.

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spoonard

None of these people admit their own screw ups. When has any major politician or head of a corporation like MS come forward and admitted they were wrong about something and they really humped the poodle on the last big decision they made??

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RUSENSITIVESWEETNESS

He's saying these things to spit in the eye of his critics. It's his style and personality.

And if I bought a new PC tomorrow, it would not have Windows 8 on it, chief.

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TrollBot5000

yeah the statement about adoption being perfect is coming from this very same person. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TFBi6Va4AQ

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firefox91

Somewhere the Boeing CEO is saying that he is "super-glad" they used those new batteries in the Dreamliners too.

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TrollBot5000

"In the first 10 weeks, we sold 60 million copies. All new consumer PCs are now Windows 8 based. So in that sense, I would say that here the adoption rate is perfect."

:puts on linux mint shirt: :paints face with Linux Mint themed green war paint: :buys plane ticket to redmond: :lands at redmond: :meets up with fellow local Linux User Group members and Redmond members: all wearing war paint with favorite distro colors: :waits til nightfall: :marches to microsoft headquarters: :leads group to hide behind some trees: :deploys stealth team to front entrance: :meanwhile hackers are easily disabling microsoft's internal security systems: :stealth team throws bottle to distract guards like in Splinter Cell: :stealth team grabs security guard and walks him over to biometric scanner to open main door: :knocks security guard out and hides body: :stealth team signals alpha group to move in: :stealth team takes point and takes out guards one by one: :the linux team makes it's way to the top floor: :steve ballmer was oblivious to the ordeal due to being face down in a pile of cocaine like in scarface...seriously I know a cokehead when I see one...remember the crazy keynote "i love this company youtube video...who said sit down!!!: :team grabs ballmer and ties him to his chair: :team begins interrogation: :part 2 coming
soon: :LEGAL DISCLAIMER: the story you just read is work of fiction and is intended for entertainment purposes only. Any non fictional similarities is strictly a coincidence. Trollbot5000 is not responsible for any anti microsoft linch mob activity.

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Neill

If I were rich, I'd pay you to make that movie.

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Alegomaster

There should be a movie based on that story.

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Mikey109105

He's still alive? Gee, I didn't notice....

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iheartpcs

Who is he trying to convince?

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Jeffredo

Peter Boyle in Young Frankenstein. If Windows 8 adoption is so perfect why are there rumors about major UI overhauls with Win Blue?

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Arnulf

What an idiot this guy is. I can't help but remember this video - more than 2 decades later it's still the same guy with same messed-up head:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGvHNNOLnCk

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ilfipian

Ballmer is his own personal yes man.

His statements are essentially content-free and simply endorse whatever it is that MS is doing/selling.

I've long ago learned to ignore what he says. Why he's still CEO is beyond me. He must have some skill set that keeps him there, but it certainly isn't his public persona or statements.

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fung0

Ballmer's job would be determined by who holds the stock. Ballmer himself has a huge chunk, so it's probably down to Bill Gates. Ballmer stays until Gates has had enough and withdraws his support. Unfortunately, Ballmer has been Gates' bosom buddy for a lot of years...

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Xenite

Perhaps he's the only one who knows how to work the office coffee machine? Really this clown should of been fired after Windows 8 launch... complete debacle.

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Bullwinkle J Moose

Hey Ballmer

I'm Super Glad as well
We figured out how to use an O.S. that is not allowed by the new UEFI Bios and do so without violating the DMCA

It's so fantastical to not let the Government sponsored spyware-8 monitor everything we do as well

Don't you wish everyone was that smart......and Super Glad?

Ballmer?

Comment?

Hello?

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ftldelay

I hated Windows 8 from the first moment I tried it, but recently decided to give it another chance recently and installed it on a laptop. With ClassicShell installed (thx MaxPC), it was usable and I could probably deal with having it as my main OS. The tile interface (Metro) was a confusing mess and utterly worthless. Maybe it's better on a touch-enabled system, but it still seems like it would be somewhat frustrating. Things that are usually simple to do that I usually take for granted were either hard to find or difficult to figure out. I'll stick with Windows 7 - thank-you-very-much. Are any businesses actually migrating to this? It'd be an IT nightmare IMO.

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macmooda

I personally think that classic shell sucks. You should try this one. It puts the legit start button and menu from windows 7 into windows 8. And you can disable the start screen, hot corners, and the charms bar. Works awesome. You can get it from

http://www.iobit.com/iobitstartmenu8.php

and a good review for it is at

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njznJT1dxiY

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fung0

Classic Shell rocks. It doesn't just copy the "legit" start menu, it improves on it. And does great things for Explorer as well.

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TommM

Obviously, if he thinks he says it often enough, it will make it real.

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Mungo

Hannibal Lecter: First principles, Microsoft. Simplicity. Read Marcus Aurelius. Of each particular thing ask: what is it in itself? What is its nature? What do they do, these consumers you seek?

Steve Ballmer : They use computers...

Hannibal Lecter: No. That is incidental. What is the first and principal thing they do? What needs do they serve by using computers?

Steve Ballmer : Anger, um, social acceptance, and, huh, sexual frustrations, sir..

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fung0

I think you've nailed it. Microsoft would do better with either Marcus Aurelius or Hannibal Lecter in charge.

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