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In Episode 156 of the No BS Podcast, we tasked you to come up with a limerick. Not just any limerick: entries had to explain why, exactly, a PC is better than a Mac. The prize? Eternal fame, plus an Asus EAH5830 graphics card courtesy of Asus.
Winner receives video card. Non-winner gets sense of satisfaction.
More than 150 entries came in. We narrowed the field to our 10 favorites, and now it's your turn. Read the 10 limericks that made the cut (we've removed the names of the submitters for now) and decide which one you think is the best, then leave a comment on this post with your vote!
1.
Bob paid a lot for his brand new device
And I’ll admit that it does look quite nice
"Ah, but the new version's better"
Said the man in the sweater
"I’ll take one," said Bob, "what's the price?"
2.
There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose card was so long when he stuck it,
Into his PC,
It broke into three,
But it was still faster than a Mac money pit.
3.
Found a Dell and G5 from '03,
So support is a big deal for me.
For the PC, that's grand,
Steve Jobs says "Pound sand!"
Toss a Mac in the airlock with glee!
4.
There once was a Jobs-fearing serf
Who leapt up from his desk with a curse.
He'd just done the math;
His life's Apple tax
Exceeded his present net worth!
5.
Gordon won't give Apple peace
Nor the Mac, nor his turtleneck fleece
He talks shit about Steve
Like you wouldn't believe
Oh fuck! It's their secret police!
6.
Hodgman meets Long for a chat.
"PC, you look kind of fat."
"I've been at the buffet.
Open Source has quite an array."
To this Long exclaimed: "What is that?"
7.
There is a genius named Kyle,
Who loves the Macintosh style,
He'd always say,
"Screwdriver?, No way!
I'd rather just add to the pile."
8.
A hipster from Frisco named Dirk,
Had a Macbook that just wouldn’t work.
The genius he spied,
Said “Your hard drive has died.”
So the hipster could only say… <robot voice> “Okay, I guess I’ll just buy a new MacBook Pro at full retail price…”
9.
In the year nineteen-eighty and four
Ran a Mac ad with jaws on the floor
It referenced George Orwell
Breaking free from control. Tell;
Isn't Steve just "The Man" all the more?
10.
Unless you wear a turtleneck sweater,
You know that the PC is better.
Custom built yourself
Not a box from the shelf
And won't cost you quite so much cheddar.
Comments are closed on this article
Nacelle
November 17, 2010 at 11:21am
I'm the author of the winning limerick. I really didn't even realize that mine was in the running. It was never intiatially read on the podcast. Imagine my suprise, to hear my name called out as the winner this week. While a 5830 isn't faster than the GTX260's in SLI, that is in my computer. It will go in my son's computer that is sill sporting a 8800gt. Since there are 4 gaming computers in my house, one for me and each of my children. It's really expensive to keep everyone in up to date. Most people can sell their old graphics card when they get a new one, to recoupe some of the cost to the purchase. Not me, I pass it down to another computer, leaving me only able to sell the lowest end card in the house, which is now Radeon 4830. BTW, I don't ever use the word cheddar to describe money. It's the only thing I could think of that rymes with sweater. Also, if there are any other people out there who live in the Muncie, IN area, I'm always looking for PC gamers to LAN with. www.munciegamers.com
laughingvulcan
November 03, 2010 at 2:57pm
#8 clearly hits the PC/Mac debate nail right on the head.
ncjohnson24
November 03, 2010 at 2:50pm
See Dirk had to put on his skinny jeans and hop in his mothers touareg to go get a new Mac, half way to the apple store he had to turn back because he had forgotten his oversized headphones. Boo hipsters and macs!
Pastor Of Muppets
November 03, 2010 at 5:50am
Jobs doesn't wear a turtleneck "sweater"... that's what you wore skiing in the 80's, and I hate when people say "cheddar", so I have to go with #8, although there are some other good ones here.
pseudonary
November 01, 2010 at 6:26pm
and just brilliant. Far beyond the typical thinking of Mac-bashing PC fans (who are as drone-like as any Mac fanboy). Numbers 4 and 6 tie for a distant second.
Jitna
November 01, 2010 at 10:32am
It looks like the cool thing to do is vote for #10. So go right ahead, sit back, sip your latte, vote for #10 and hate yourself for it. Just like a Mac user.
#1 for me since i agree with the statements it makes
I hate how Apple iterates versions to sell new, but break old devices. itunes broke my first and last ipod.
I hate how apple users are sheep who buy every one of those iterations.
I hate how much apple products cost - even though i wouldn't buy them myself.
I hate how nice apple products look, because it people buy them and don't support better platforms that only slightly abuse the people who use thier products instead of completely abusing them.
those reasons are why my PC is better than a MAC, among others
krazypoloc
November 01, 2010 at 7:31am
And whats with all these people voting for #10? OS X=OS #10...I think we have a bunch of closet Mac users in the house.
kris79
November 01, 2010 at 6:19am
#4. Too true... bought apples for years until I wised up and started building PCs myself...
patrickmaher
November 01, 2010 at 1:37am
My vote is for #10.
Most of the rest are just focusing on bashing Macs and not really going with the PC vs. Mac theme.
BrandNewJesus
October 31, 2010 at 11:11am
There were many good ones, but 9 for historical.
give the man his card!
gc
October 31, 2010 at 4:30am
9 vote for sure
rhythm and the right syllables count.
ps
mostly all of these are incorrect limericks.
and i DQ those using the word sweater.
johnpfonte
October 30, 2010 at 5:01pm
#5, who doesn't expect Jobs to have police to avoid bad press? The greatness of PCs speaks for itself.
MCGREW
October 30, 2010 at 1:24pm
#9 is by far the best and if you've see this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYecfV3ubP8 you will think so too
emadgreek
October 30, 2010 at 12:56pm
#9FTW, it took a little bit of nerd power and backstory to truelly understand its brilliance.
Gamer Girl
October 30, 2010 at 11:24am
#8 was the funniest on the podcast. Bravo for thinking outside the limerick box. Made me laugh out loud at work, since I had a friend buy a new mac because the dvd drive went out on his and it was just easier that way.
bicyclist
October 30, 2010 at 9:13am
Anyone that can include my favorite Maximum PC personality in a Limerick gets MY vote.
It's also relevant & true.
Rinimand
October 30, 2010 at 4:32am
I would for mine but I don't see it. It was so good, I guess it never made it to your inbox.
Barring that, I guess #8. Even though it breaks a rule, it's the best of what you got.
Arclite
October 29, 2010 at 8:27pm
5 is very funny, and 10 gets to the essence of Max PC, but 6 has my heart for why PCs are great: open source software.
Looks like 10 has it in the bag tho.
Zaxix
October 29, 2010 at 8:20pm
#5 made me laugh
special mention to # 10, so true
Most use the machines dubbed wintel
To do their computing tasks well
But every single day
If Steve Job’s had his way
The PC could just rot in hell
squarebab
October 29, 2010 at 5:14pm
Having agonized over many component choices and having beamed with pride upon the completion of many builds over the years, I choose number ten as the best limerick.
joeyjr
October 29, 2010 at 4:42pm
My PC has always been compatible,
For all my programs and games.
To switch now would be unimaginable.
I really don’t care what the claims,
Apple is still the forbidden fruit for thoughts with halve the brains.
Arclite
October 29, 2010 at 8:06pm
Your poem they did not pick,
Because it's not a limerick.
You must conform,
To limerick norm.
Do research before Submit you click!
Zombie Woof
October 29, 2010 at 4:08pm
I'm going with the one they liked on the podcast, #8. Like Gordon said, "It's funny AND true!"
