LHC Restart Delayed Until September, Earth Still Safe
Posted 02/12/09 at 07:03:05 PM by Pulkit Chandna
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CERN has announced that its Light Hadron Collider will only begin unraveling scientific mysteries in September. The most intricate machine ever built was forced into a stasis after it developed technical faults soon after being turned on for the first time in September 2008.
Although the machine’s return to action was scheduled for November 2008, the restart was pushed to July 2009. Now CERN has further delayed the re-launch. Around $24 million dollars have already been spent in repairing the gargantuan machine. You can expect more apocalyptic predictions during the time leading to its relaunch.
caption: "bring it on
Submitted by xs0u1x on Sat, 02/14/2009 - 11:52pm
caption: "bring it on crytek....bitches"
Submitted by linkmaster6 on Sat, 02/14/2009 - 8:03am
Lets hope the Pope's bastard son doesn't get his hands on the results for real
Submitted by smashingpumpin on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 9:01pm
I'm pretty damn sure, once this thing is finally up and running it would go SOISOISOISOISOISOISOISOISOI.
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...and what does this have to do with porn?
Submitted by Shckr57 on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 1:35pm
I don't know but I bet ya it'll be over 9000!!!!!!!!
Submitted by festiva_man on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 12:52am
Maybe it will just take down France. That would be nice.
Submitted by StealthSilver on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 6:54pm
This just in! Light Hydron Collider launch delayed until December 21st, 2012.
Uh-oh...
Wait...
Submitted by CTskifreak on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 7:12pm
http://www.december212012.com/ ...oh noesssssss!!!! hahahah
Submitted by nerdman978 on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 6:50pm
the odds of the LHC spawning a blackhole are nonzero....meaning said odds are equal to your odds of spontaneously combusting.
not guts not glory man
I tell you what. If the LHC
Submitted by I Jedi on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 6:37pm
I tell you what. If the LHC ends up working, then that's great! Why? Think about it, all the new scientific breakthroughs we'll make, etc. If somehow it spawns a blackhole and kills us all, then that's also great, too! Face it, the human race is nothing but a bunch of assholes and I for one could give two shits if we go down the hole (If you get what I mean.) seeing as how I won't know a black hole has happened as ILL ALREADY BE TORN APART BY MASSIVE TIDLE WAVES, etc.
LOL
Submitted by jwalch.hawk on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 7:50am
"Face it, the human race is nothing but a bunch of assholes and I for one could give two shits if we go down the hole"
^^^ That officially made my day. I'm not sure wtf black holes have to do with tidal/tidle/tilde waves, but whatever. Kill the humans! Err...
Submitted by compro01 on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 9:03am
Gravitational tidal forces.
Stick the planet within the Roche limit of a black hole (or any other suitably massive spacial object, like our sun, Jupiter, or Saturn) and the earth will get torn apart before it gets sucked in.
Submitted by jwalch.hawk on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 6:03pm
The *Light* Hadron Collider? I suppose the hadrons, being subatomic particles, are light relative to our normal perspective...
But these particular hadrons are (relatively speaking) *Large*. Notice how that also starts with an "L"? Coincidence? ;)
Ya know.......
Submitted by ghot on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 5:46pm
There are 2 great books by Dan Simmons (sci-fi) that besides being a great read.....I think were inspired by the LHC project ^^ One is called ILIUM and the other (sequel) is called OLYMPOS...check them out :)
Hint: Paris is in the far future nothing but a crater......a HUGE crater.
NOONE can claim true Geek Cred w/o these 2 books under their belt :)
Take efficiency, and edit out all the intelligence and what you have left is a post-XP Microsoft operating system :)
Submitted by CTskifreak on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 5:42pm
BLACK HOLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
we're all gonna die.
Submitted by nekollx on Thu, 02/12/2009 - 5:10pm
we're all gonna die.
I agree... They want to
Submitted by pcwizmtl on Fri, 02/13/2009 - 10:36am
I agree...
They want to simulate "the God effect" or whatever they call it by recreating the big bang...
How the hell do they expect to control this?!?
They weren't even sure when they tested they A-Bomb if the explosion would stop expanding.
Shit, if I go out because of something stupid I did, fine, but because they want to be Gods? I'm not cool with that...
First the A-Bomb, then HAARP, now this.
All in the interest of science.
or is it Power?
Submitted by sirnotapearing on Sat, 02/14/2009 - 11:54am
so if they get a universe they know how everything came about but given the efort they put in to creating this miniverse they rule out chance. I wonder if they thought of that. also they prove that it takes a force bigger then the universe to make the universe and yet they are still going to say everthing is by chance.
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