Laptop Pads Ineffective in Combating Laptop-Induced Infertility



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Zachary K.

these cooling pads are going the wrong way, instead of cooling the laptop, lets just go directly to the problem and cool our crotch.


Keith E. Whisman

OK ok ok ok.... Listen, you are constantly producing sperm, so what if you kill off all the sperm in your nuts in one sitting. Go choke your chicken and make room for fresh live sperm and then go make out in the morning to get your girl knocked up. Unless the heat kills off your ability to produce live sperm. Another thing, if your so concerned with your sperm dying off from the excessive heat, just open your fly and shove an 80MM fan in your fly hole. In fact wear one all day hooked up to a pair of 9 Volt Batteries in your pocket. Make certain that you have a fan grill on the inside at the very least. God make sure you have a good fan grill on that fan. 

Besides I think this is stupid because doesn't everyone work on the computer with their pants and underwear around their ankles anyway? I know I can't be the only one. 



A possible remedy, use one of those cooling things you put in the freezer to keep your ice chest cold. When you know your going to be using your laptop for an extended period of time, pop one of those down your pants. Problem solved. 


(To the editor: This captcha thing isn't working. I just saw a big massive spam in the replies to this article

you should get rid of it.)


Keith E. Whisman

Also here in Arizona summer temps hover in the 110'F and higher range, with that as an ambient temp, how can the sperm keep cooler outside of the body in the scrotum. I like to joke to my dad about the cold tire pressure your supposed to inflate your tires to when they hare 115'F just sitting all day on the drive way. But yeah, how do the sperm survive those high Arizona temps? I've got three kids so I know they do survive. 

So I think your sex ed teacher doesn't know what she is talking about. I know plenty of men that use laptops on their laps all day and still impregnate their wives, just when they can least afford it. 


Keith E. Whisman

If sperm dies at 98.6'F, how do they survive being ejaculated into a womans steamy cauldron during intercourse and survive the elevated temps caused by the friction of sex and them swim through the hot depths to the egg? I've got three kids so at least three sperm have survived the heat to viability.



Dang dude this is cool...but I wonder if its even worth to spend the $$$...  

The only thing I've bought within this past month thats even worth spending my hard earned cash was my Hackintosh, custom-built, hardcore Have 3 screens running in windows and OSX 10.6.4, I game on my 24" with my GFX card I got in there.  If anyone needs a hackytosh best people to go is  they got some bad a55 machines..I wish I would have afforded their 12-Core system but ahhh humb bug maybe next year. Maybe by Xmas I can get the 980x setup from them...!!!! It would rock any gamers world.  I play Starcraft 2, do some light video editing work on the Mac side, some designing work from photoshop.

You probably can get a cool discount if you mention me heard they were throwing a 10% discount for referalls but don't call at once there busy as it is.  Tell them Tim Gee sent ya...they'll hook it up with a coo discount. I got mine free naysayers go down with your apple mac's.




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