Serious Sam 3 Gets Serious about Fighting Piracy... with a Giant Pink Scorpion
Serious Sam 3 Gets Serious about Fighting Piracy... with a Giant Pink Scorpion
Posted 12/07/2011 at 11:49pm
| by Nathan Grayson
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Here at MPC, we sort of despise videogame pirates. Like, with a passion. And yet, even working with that and our penchant for dreaming up nightmarish death traps for all who cross us, we doubt we could have devised something this cruel. This horrific. This absolutely wonderful. It begins the very second you boot up a pirated copy of Serious Sam 3: BFE. Your crimes, you see, have implicitly forged some sort of eternal death pact with an absurdly speedy, even more absurdly giant pink scorpion monster. He is also immortal. No matter where you go, he will follow. On the upside, you'll never be lonely. On the downside, just kidding there is no upside. Have a gander at the video after the break and join us in a big, long laugh at pirates' expense.
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compro01
December 09, 2011 at 7:46am
And 10 years from now when we're using windows X and want to play this old game, we'll then have this stupid scorpion chasing us through our legally purchased game because this stupid DRM breaks horribly.
davem69
December 08, 2011 at 6:51pm
Fun idea but not original. A long time ago there was a game called Starflight that employed a similar concept. In order to leave the starport you had to give a passcode (from a code wheel). If you failed the code check, you could still launch your ship but the space police would chase you everywhere you went. Once they caught up, you were given another chance to enter the code. If you failed again, the space police would disable your ship's shields, weapons, and engines before blasting you to bits. Of course all of this would only occur AFTER creating and customizing your crew and ship. At that point you would have invested a good 30 minutes into the game.
__Meerkat Attack__
December 12, 2011 at 7:16pm
OMG!!! ... I had that game and loved it! For it's time it was huge and let you explore an almost endless amount of planets and star systems (though randomly generated) . It was divided into two large files for storage, and in the second one was recorded all the store and item prices in plain ANSII, so all you needed was a simple hex editor to make all the money you wanted. Years later I tried to remake the game using C with 640x480 vga graphics. {Ha Ha} Ahhh, those where the good old days… until I lost my key wheel! St ill have it on two 5.25” floppies :D
aarcane
December 08, 2011 at 5:40pm
So clearly there's already a patch to remove the scorpion from the downloaded version, but how would I, (presumably) a paying customer obtain this additional DLC afforded only to those too smart to pay for the scorpion-free edition? Is there a DLC I can pay for to get access to "Insanely Hard in Insane Ways" mode, or am I screwed because I (again, presumably) paid for the game?
Of course, I haven't bought the game yet, nor have I pirated it. Now I think I'll feel shafted either way :( Besides, who is Sam and Why So Serious?
LatiosXT
December 08, 2011 at 9:24am
This would make for a great self-imposed challenge. Can you beat the game with a pink scorpion behind you the entire time?
Tenhawk
December 08, 2011 at 9:16am
I don't even LIKE the Serious Sam games and this is making me want to download a pirated copy to check out the pink scorpion. Of course it's already been removed from most pirated copies on the web now, so I'd probably just get stuck playing the actual game... which isn't worth the download bandwidth, so I suppose I'll resist the urge.
Ashton2091
December 08, 2011 at 9:09am
As funny as this is, and as much as I feel about pirating (it's wrong)...this won't do anything to help the situation. No drm will. That's the prob. Although, this is what drm should be. anywho, some people try to justify it, but again its bigger than that. Most people are simply saying that it will always be around and do you seriously think that crappy drm that pirates are able to get around and legit gamers have to live with will stop it? I don't think so tim
Ashton2091
December 08, 2011 at 9:10am
and no...it's not a lost sale if the pirater was to never buy it. that's not justifying it...that's just simple logic. me...i love steam. i buy games, but that won't make pirating go away
kixofmyg0t
December 08, 2011 at 9:30am
Exactly! I pirated Skyrim and its a great game! I knew I could get it without paying for it so I was never gonna buy the game anyway. But I get to play it just like paying customers do! Thanks to piracy we never have to pay for anything again!
Ashton2091
December 08, 2011 at 9:41am
cute. but sarcasm is so unecessary. just ask yourself this...has DRM done anything for legit gamers and corporations yet? cause all games with drm are still being pirated. and actually, pirates generally get a better experience than paying customers. sucks, but it's true. again sarcasm unecessary here. im a paying gamer.
kixofmyg0t
December 09, 2011 at 10:25am
I'm being serious. I don't give a fluck about any of the DRM or w/e.
I've become a pirate because all I have to do is say "I was never gonna buy the game anyway" and I'm instantly absolved of all my online sins. AND I GET TO PLAY JUST LIKE YOU DO FOR FREE.
Ashton2091
December 09, 2011 at 1:22pm
lol. sorry...but it did sound like sarcasm. my bad. i enjoy steam, but i get why anyone would want to pirate. hell, i pirated a few times. i use steam now which is kind of a love hate relationship. i love the price of a lot of games and i like the fact that i can find old stuff that i forgot about for a reasonable price. what i hate is having to download the games i want to play from steam. sometimes i feel that if im gonna eat that much bandwidth anyways...i may as well pirate it. lol
kixofmyg0t
December 09, 2011 at 6:28pm
I havn't used Steam since 2005 when my life was consumed by CS:Source. Hacked that game to hell.
I remember the 1.6 days as well......brings back memories of OGC! Good ol aimbots, wall hacks, speed hacks. Fun stuff for me. Not for the people playing with me lol.
I may actually get back into Steam. At least to look at what they have now.
skirge01
December 08, 2011 at 11:05am
Love the comments on TPB! BUY the d@mn game, people!
"this crack works perfectly to level "Under the Iron Cloud," then everything starts to turn,this is sh1t,this is not 100% working crack!!!"
"This crack will work until level 4, when another anti piracy protection will stop you from playing...."
"What's the point? Gives u error messages + BIG CRASH :)"
blkpanthr
December 08, 2011 at 2:15pm
my fave comment:
"Son of a bitch I'm fucking dizzy, head spinning around and shit. WTF! These Croteam guys are a trip. Pretty soon Sam is going to pop out of the computer and strangle our ass for not buying the game."
lol
Mad props to Croteam. I wonder if they are monitoring those comments and laughing their ass off...
B_H
December 08, 2011 at 11:18am
Anti-piracy measures that make you play the game to discover them all. Brilliant.
Ashton2091
December 08, 2011 at 9:17am
haha...see...drm doesn't work. but hey...at least they made it exciting this time
kixofmyg0t
December 08, 2011 at 4:44am
So alot of people on here have tried to justify piracy with the "if you wernt gonna buy it then its not a lost sale".
So Im not interested in this game.....I guess I should pirate it and play it(with the pink scorpion removed) then shouldnt I? I mean I wasn't gonna buy it anyway.....
xs0u1x
December 08, 2011 at 6:24am
piracy is the electronic boogeyman as communism is the political boogeyman. is it a problem? sure, could be. but game sales figures don't have me weeping and picking up my pitch fork just yet.
its used to justify screwing over end consumers and squeeze out another buck in multiple sectors of the industry. those "you wouldn't steal a car" promo's at the beginning of movies are akin to reefer madness in nature. besides, as you stated below, what exactly is this going to accomplish? pirates will just mod the game, remove that feature and BAM. they have a superior working product to its drm encumbered sibling. this does nothing but encourage more pitchfork waving as started out in the article by the author.
B_H
December 08, 2011 at 8:53am
I remember seeing a similar "car" defense for pirating. "What if someone copied your car? Would you be mad? No! Because your car is still there!"
What if someone walked into my store for some beer and chips. They copy it, and walk out. Am I mad? I mean, my stuff's still there right?
Share Linux. Share Libre Office. Share Audacity. This is software that was created to be shared freely. Serious Sam was created to feed developer's families. You can use the pirating to fight "the machine" argument if you want, but how is a game company any different from a clothes store? They are for-profit businesses. And how is DRM any different from the security tags on the clothes (I know, I know, it doesn't get "removed" after the purchase)?
I will not wait until sales numbers announce the industry is in the shit hole to show integrity when I interact with a business.
SeloFile
December 08, 2011 at 8:12am
Honestly, it's this kind of laxidaisical attitude toward piracy that has hurt PC gaming so much. DRM is not a solution, but publishers won't stop foolishly believing in it so long as greedy gamers keep feeling entitled to stuff for free. Remember that DRM is a response to piracy, it's not the other way around. I don't steal cameras from PC Richard & Son even though I despise their ancient "person checking your receipt after you have already purchased your items so you wait in two fucking lines" system. I simply don't shop there, no matter how good their deals get.
Hell, 90% of World of Goo's distribution on PC was pirated, Carmel has said so himself. What do you think the Wii rate was? And that's a DRM-free, independent game with no ties to 'big-publishers' or their control schemes and veiled messages, so why the hell would he lie about it? It's just a flat-out, nigh-unbelievable number that illustrates exactly how much of a problem it is.
DRM sucks, but so do pirates. Plain and simple.
aarcane
December 08, 2011 at 5:35pm
You realize that by law they can't compell you to wait in that line. Once you've paid you legally own the reciept, the bag, the merchendise therein, and any attempt to force you to show them any of it consitutes illegal search and seisure or unlawful detainment. You have the right to simply walk out of the store once you've paid for your merchendise.
In exchange, they have the right (in most states, but not all!) to refuse to accept refunds or exchanges.
Locally we have a Fry's store that does exactly that. If there's no line, I'll stop and let them scribble on my reciept with a hilighter if it makes them feel better. If the exit is busy, I just go around, note what color marker they're using today, and scribble on it myself while I wait at the intersection to turn out.
DoctorX
December 08, 2011 at 9:17am
well.. i have bought the game 4 times... on pc and all the other platforms... including on steam.
I bought it when it was on the humble bundle and play it on linux and windows and android,etc.
I used to pirate before steam... but since, i do not anymore.
kixofmyg0t
December 08, 2011 at 4:38am
For ten minutes until pirates mod the game to remove that.
Which was a few hours ago.
lostcause64
December 08, 2011 at 7:56am
But some unsuspecting, thieving tool gets ambushed by something they weren't expecting. I still love it!
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