Pseudo-Scientific Real World Testing: Is It Safer to Drive Drunk or On the Phone?
With the recent hullaballoo over the dangers of talking on the the phone while driving, we couldn't help but be reminded of a real-world experiment our sister publication Mobile ran way back in February 2005 about the very same issue. Using noted drinker Roger Hibbert as a guinea pig, they headed for the hallowed grounds of our local Malibu Grand Prix, carrying a phone, a stopwatch, a Breathalyzer, and bottle of 100-proof Absolut. Our goal: To find out if our subject could stay on the road while besotted or blathering. Our results will shock you to your very soul. Naturally, the tests are completely un-scientific, but it's a funny read, and the results are sobering (a-ha!) so we thought we'd repost it here for your consideration. Enjoy!

Is the cell phone really worse than the bottle? We drink and drive so that you don’t have to!
Fancy-pants scientists may say that cell phones may be worse than a nip of hooch when it comes to driving, so we did a quasiscientific and questionably legal experiment of our own to see just how seriously these twin menaces — cell phones and vodka — can affect driving ability.
Using noted drinker Roger Hibbert as a guinea pig, we headed for the hallowed grounds of our local Malibu Grand Prix, carrying a phone, a stopwatch, a Breathalyzer, and bottle of 100-proof Absolut. Our goal: To find out if our subject could stay on the road while besotted or blathering. Our results will shock you to your very soul.
TRIAL 1
Net alcohol consumption: Nil
Other encumbrances: Nil
BAC*: 0.00 percent
Average lap time: 1:05
General observations: Subject is having a good time, really enjoys competing with self and other Mobile PC staff members to improve time. Subject indeed experiencing “great family fun” as promised by Malibu Grand Prix (MGP) signage.

TRIAL 2
Net alcohol consumption: Nil
Other encumbrances: cell phone
BAC: 0.00 percent
Average lap time: 1:14
General observations: Due to strict helmet regulations at MGP, subject is forced to use speakerphone, which he holds in one hand. Driving is erratic, a little jerky due to one-handed driving, and very, very slow. Subject reports the phone is “very distracting” as he obliviously plows through the grass on the course.

TRIAL 3
Net alcohol consumption: 2 ounces
Other encumbrances: Nil
BAC: 0.01 percent
Average lap time: 1:04
General observations: Subject is driving well
but skidding frequently as he seeks to improve his time; he’s driving faster than during predrinking trials. Otherwise, quality of laps is similar to fully sober quality.

TRIAL 4
Net alcohol consumption: 4 ounces
Other encumbrances: Nil
BAC: 0.05 percent
Average lap time: 1:05
General observations: Mobile PC photographer Samantha Berg notes that she would have passed out after four shots, but subject is going strong. “I’m feeling it a bit,” reports subject, as he spills some on himself. Car is fishtailing and nearly stalls once, but speed is still consistent. Driving quality is clearly on the downswing.

Want to know what happens when you drive a go kart after taking 12 shots? Read on!
![]()
EdnaM
July 25, 2011 at 11:34am
I think is better not to drink and not to talk on the phone while driving.This shouldn't be an option.Working as a volunteer for a Florida holistic drug rehab center I see every day people consumed by guilt.Imagine living a whole life consumed by the guilt of killing someone because you were drunk or talking on the phone while driving.I respect them for seeking help for their alcohol addiction,but I wish everyone would be more serious when it comes to consequences of driving under influence.
![]()
Scott88
January 26, 2011 at 10:36am
Texting and driving is super dangerous, but driving drunk claims more lives so that's your answer. If you have a problem driving drunk then you have a problem with alcohol. You should look into an alcohol and drug rehab and change your life so you don't hurt yourself or somebody else.
![]()
xmannd
January 14, 2011 at 2:22pm
If you have one of these problems with drugs or alcohol ..in my opinion you must go at Vista bay rehab they will know how to rehabilitate you very fast and with no stress
![]()
inout
January 06, 2011 at 2:29pm
i think that this action depens on the man. i know people that drived drunk or smoked or talking to the phone and they hadn't no problem. even two of them told me that they drive better drunk. but not all are cut to do this kind of stunts. so my adivce is to drive safe and sobber. for more studies you can find out from <a rel="follow" href="http://www.drug-rehab.org/Arizona.html">www.drug-rehab.org</a>
![]()
dinny
November 09, 2010 at 7:16am
That's an interesting study and I strongly believe it should be done on a scientifically level and taken more seriously, the official results of this study may have an influence on our auto insurance quotes.
![]()
daniel.hkcs
August 03, 2010 at 11:29pm
How does alcohol affect someone who has been diagnosed with aortic valve stenosis?
Paul - ultrasound sydney
![]()
The Relic
July 22, 2009 at 9:59am
Can't tell you how many times I've almost been ran over by morons who are too busy chatting on their cell phones to either use their turn signals, slow down for the light or notice me in the crosswalk...and seeing as how I lost my father to a drunken bastard, they could shoot them for all I care.
![]()
nekollx
July 22, 2009 at 10:05am
just this morning a bluetooth wearing bi*** tried to cut of the BUS i was riding on...
------------------------------
Coming soon to Lulu.com --Tokusatsu Heroes--
Five teenagers, one alien ghost, a robot, and the fate of the world.
![]()
mesiah
July 22, 2009 at 8:39pm
There is a hidden moral to this story. If you need to get somewhere faster (and don't mind running over a few cones,) get drunk first. But if you over do it, call a friend on the way to keep yourself focused.
![]()
arch-chancellor
July 21, 2009 at 4:37pm
They did this exact experiment with a real car and state police and found that talking on the phone was just as bad or worse than being drunk. I can't remember when this episode first aired, but I think it was after this article was originally posted.
![]()
willsmith
July 21, 2009 at 6:18pm
I'm reasonably certain that Mobile had gone away by the time Mythbusters was on the air. It was a funny episode though!
![]()
bingojubes
July 21, 2009 at 3:42pm
as unscientific as it was, it seemed like a good test that could be used as a stepping stone for researchers. more of these articles, please! i liked this one alot. will we be eventually seeing what the study finds if doing the bumper boats with same criteria?
![]()
AntiHero
July 21, 2009 at 2:59pm
That was awesome. I wish there were videos.
I don't like Microsoft, I associate with it.
![]()
nekollx
July 21, 2009 at 2:55pm
pure win
------------------------------
Coming soon to Lulu.com --Tokusatsu Heroes--
Five teenagers, one alien ghost, a robot, and the fate of the world.















