The Game Boy: Dear Consoles, Never Change – Love, MPC
It’s been nearly four years since the Xbox 360 helped consoles get their graphical groove back, which – of course – kicked off the current console generation. Time flies, doesn’t it? The Xbox 360, then -- if we’re going by Tech Standard Time (TST) -- should now be on its last legs. A dinosaur on its death bed, facing extinction by the meteoric approach of a new “next-gen” Microsoft console. But it’s not. In fact, if Microsoft and Sony have things their way, the current console generation will keep on chugging along for another five years.

Not long ago, for us PC gamers and our beefy, ever-evolving rigs, this would have been a moot point – or even a nice bit of superiority to hold over console gamers’ heads. “Our graphics are prettier than yours! Neener-neener-neener!” But times have changed. PC exclusives are few and far-between, and many are only one mediocre first week of sales away from being ported to consoles (*cough*Crysis*cough*). The large majority of games are unable to take full advantage of PC hardware, because consoles and their aging innards are holding everyone else back. Sorry state of affairs, ain’t it?
And I couldn’t be happier.
Why? Because we’ve finally reached a temporary cease-fire in the war over who can render the most realistic videogame graphics. And so, in order to differentiate their games from the bump-mapped masses, many developers are getting creative.
For instance, lately I’ve been wading through WET, an over-the-top action game from Bethesda and Artificial Mind and Movement. Unfortunate title aside, the game’s chock full of excellent ideas – the greatest of which, I’d say, is its aesthetic. Basically, WET’s a playable grindhouse/pulp film. As you sail through the air in slow-mo and pile up a body count of something around 6.7 billion, punk music blares and your character tosses out all sorts of B-movie-friendly one-liners. To top it off, all the action is wrapped in a film grain, and when your character kicks the bucket, the film reel tears and pops. In between gameplay sections, the game even airs old-timey film-style commercials, promoting things like church attendance, hotdogs, and something called a “Personality Pickle.”